Where I belong to

(This post is entirely based on my own opinions and perceptions)

Individualism or collectivism? I feel that i am in the middle, a bit of both as i grew up in a very chinese environment which is a collective culture but due to the different aspects of influence when growing up, i am becoming more of an individualist.
I grew up in a traditional Chinese family where my parents cultivated certain thoughts and culture in me. One is to maintain the harmony in the family and not quarrel with my siblings and the older siblings should always give in to the younger siblings. I also feel that i have a duty towards my parents as they took care and supported me all the way to university and i should support and take care of them in future when they are old.

My parents have taught me to be thrifty since young and not to spend money unnecessarily as earning money is not easy and we will experience it when we grow up. But as i start working and earn money, i tend to spend more on personal items that can satisfy me. Like a gucci bag for example, I do not really need a expensive bag but it just satisfies me after buying it. It is like a form of self indulgence to reward me at the end month with my pay check. I believe that majority of traditional Chinese families have parents who want their kids to be obedient and listen to them all the time, but it is quite difficult to have kids listening to their parents all the time now with a more open society. I also had this problem where i had to break the barrier in my parent’s old thoughts and let them know that we are no longer the same kind of children in their generation and need our own freedom, thoughts and speech. So i feel that it is not only us who are struggling to find out who we are but also our elder generations who are trying to, they are caught in the old culture but have to try to adapt to the new culture.

In the past, people are not so concerned with our own comfort and social recognition but only want to bring the money home for the family so they can have proper meals. But now, majority of the youngsters want comfort where they go dine in expensive restaurants, watch shows in theatre instead of home and also drink coffee in cafe instead of coffee shops. They want social recognition by dressing up in the latest fashion and publicizing themselves in blogs. The change in culture is also brought about by our progression of our society -  we are no longer the village but a prosperous city.

As our country now is a mix of both East and West, it is difficult to truly identify which culture you belong to. I feel that as long as we keep the cultural values important to us and not forget them, we will be able to have our own identity.

This is Singapore

(Clip took from YouTube)

I came across this very Singapore clip in youtube. There is no songs or lyrics but only an accompanying music for this 4 minute clip. I wanted to post this clip as it is really very Singapore and we can relate to it immediately after watching it. It also displays the Singapore culture to a certain extend. Some might find the clip quite boring as its just the different scenes that represents Singapore throughout the 4 minutes, but  i feel that it makes us remember what we forgot as we are progressing too fast.

It started with the different high rise buildings in the CBD area, to show the growing development of Singapore. After this scene, it jumped to a scene with a man fishing in a lake. I feel that this shows the contrast between our fast development and yet there are some parts in Singapore that has the slow pace of life. Another scene shows a man cycling on a trishaw which is our mode of transportation in the olden days (60′s and 70′s) then following is a scene with all the cars and buses zooming pass. This is another contrast to show the development and efficiency of Singapore, where we no longer use trishaws and rickshaws but cars, buses and MRT for our transportation.

The clip also showed some iconic representations of Singapore, which is the HDB flats and Merlion. The HDB flats are symbolic to Singapore due to our limited land space, which is not a problem faced by many other countries. The Merlion is another symbol of Singapore as the head represents the beast that once roamed the ancient island state and the fish body represents the Singapore’s origin as a prosperous seaport. The Merlion has been an icon since Singapore became independent and is definitely one of our most symbolic item.

Towards the end of the clip, it feature some old shop houses with the very old sign boards still hanging along Clarke Street. I feel that the message that the director wants to put across to the audience is to keep our culture despite us progressing economically and socially. I couldn’t agree more that our society should try to maintain and keep certain cultures to not forget our origins. Cultures play a very important aspect in our lives but i feel that we are progressing more towards a Western culture which is something that cannot be prevented. However, we should always keep our own culutre within us to remember who we are.

my group members

Through the projects meeting that i went through, I agree that group synergy is very important for a group. With the right attitudes and direction, the group is able to move together in cohesion and provide the best for the group. Within my group, we all have a clear idea what we want (which is to score and do well for this project) and we all try to put in the best effort to make things work.

The group socialisation in my group has influenced me to put in more effort for every meeting that we have. As the rest of my group members are very hard working students and I know that they all want to score for this project, I feel that i have a need to contribute more during meetings and not pull the group dynamics down.

There are different task and maintanence roles taken up by individual groups members so that my group functions well as a whole. Majority of my group members are opinion and information giver. Everytime during meetings, all of them will prepare something to contribute. Throughout the meeting, they will further add in their own opinions and also elaborate and stress on information that they think is important. Sean, our group leader, essentially acts as the coordinator and orientator as he is always the one who schedules the meeting timing and venue. He will also make sure that the meeting is conducted in an effective way to not waste unneccessray time. All of us are contributors in the group as everyone speaks their own mind during the meeting and provides valuable information to help the project.

As well for maintanence roles, all i can say is that we all play a part as encorager, harmoniser, compromiser and standard setter. We all have fun and laughter, sometimes even crack stupid jokes, during the meetings. Besides, each of us will also encourage the others to speak their mind as we often laugh and joke together. The harmonious realtionship that we have in our group makes every one feel at ease and be able to speak freely. We all do play a part as a compormiser as we will give in to each other’s ideas and even if we do not agree, we will discuss as a whole as to why we do not agree to this idea.

To conclude, I would like to say to all my group members that it has been a joy working with you guys as we always have fun and laughter in our discussions. Although there are times when we really talk crap but we always end up having quality work done. Despite the long hours of meeting, we never give up and try to work things out. I am proud and happy to have you guys as part of the team.

From strangers to family

Synopsis of movie:
Shi-Jie (Jay Chou) is a brilliant martial artist from the Kungfu School. The master of the school adopted him as a baby, when he was found abandoned in the woods. His remarkable kungfu skills stem from his innate intuition and ability to read his opponents moves. One day, he encounters a group of youths playing basketball and shows off how easy it is for him, with his martial arts training, to do a Slam Dunk. Watching him was Chen-Li (Eric Tsang), a shrewd businessman, who decides that he would exploit Shi-Jie to make some money. Under the guise of helping Shi-Jie to find his family, he recruits him to play varsity basketball at the local university.

(Information taken from http://www.gv.com.sg/moviedetails/gv_moviedetails_2561.jsp) 

I am going to use this movie, Kung Fu Dunk, to illustrate the interpersonal relationship between Shi Jie and Chen Li.
They first form their relationship through similarity, where they both met each other in a park with the same situation. One was kicked out by the master and had no place to go but the park; and another was poor and had nothing to do but can only stay in the park to read newspaper. Next was complementarities and exchange, Shi Jie had perfect shooting skills and was able to perfect every flying dart and basketball shot while Chen Li had a business mind where he knew how to market Shi Jie so he was able to make money out of him. They were able to complement each other with their different abilities. There was a process of give and take in this relationship. There was reciprocity and likingbetween the 2 of them. Like how Chen Li cheered loudly for Shi Jie during competition.

After the relationship forming process was how they maintain their relationship. Through the movie, I assumed that Chen Li was just making use of Shi Jie to make money out of him, like forcing him to join the competition to gain publicity. But through one scene of self disclosurefrom Chen Li, he disclosed how much he cared for Shi Jie and will not sell him out to the opposing group. He will not give in despite the amount of money given as it is his dream to see Shi Jie succeed in his basketball life. This self disclosure has strengthen their relationship and increased their trust between each other.

They also had conflictswhen Chen Li forged Shi Jie’s parents handwriting to bluff him into playing the game. But it was quickly resolved when Chen Li explained his motives behind it and this shows that explanation and acceptance is important in maintaining a relationship.

Through their different experiences that they went through together, Shi Jie and Chen Li became close as father and sons. Even when Shi Jie’s biological father went to find him, he still refused to go back with the father and choose to stay beside Chen Li.

I feel that this forming and maintaining of interpersonal relationship plays a big role in our life. It applies to every aspect of our life and this is how everyone make friends, lovers and even with family members.

It’s still the Chinese New Year

The traditional Chinese New Year (CNY) festive season last for 15 days and the greetings are suppose to last for half the month. But it is only the eighth day of the Chinese New Year but it seems that the festive season is over within the first 2 days. I guess this has a big part to do with the government allocating only 2 days of holiday to this festive season. We start getting influenced by our government telling us that we only have 2 days for the CNY and we tend to do all the necessary things over these 2 days (like going to relatives house or even going to temples to pray). We will then have the mindset that CNY celebration only lasts for 2 days and we all have to get back to work or school after that. As time gradually pass, this mindset will become a part of our culture and perception that we Singaporeans Chinese celebrate CNY for 2 days only unlike the traditional Chinese.

I still remember that my perception of CNY when i was young – it will be a fun day where I get to wear new clothings, receive hongbaos from my relatives and spend the day eating all the goodies and playing with my cousins. But my perception of this yearly festive season starts to change as i grow older, this could be due to the different elements that influence my selection of information about CNY. The holiday becomes more of a chore as i need to help my mum prepare all the necessary stuff for the big day (like the cleaning up of the house, shopping for food to prepare on the day, helping my younger siblings buy new clothings and many more). I did not have to do any of this when i was a kid, but i guess this is just part and parcel of growing up. You have the obligation to help your parents when you are old enough to help them. Besides, the CNY celebration gets more stale every year with the same relatives asking you the same old questions every year. When you are younger, they will ask about your studies, then it is about your relationship then about your working life. And if at a certain age you are not married or attached, they become even more worried and start asking when you will get married. Aside from the questions, you will just glue yourself to the television majority of the time unless you have something else to do (which might be gambling; which is only allowed for the young kids during this time)

As the younger generation start the trend of “escaping CNY”, more and more young couples choose to go on a holiday during this time of the year. This is so that they can avoid giving out the hongbaos. But it is really a traditional festive season that have lasted for decades and decades and it is only right that we as Chinese make a point to celebrate it. If not the CNY will only be deem as just another holiday and not be given any importance which is what CNY feels to me now. My perception of CNY now is that it is just a holiday for me to rest and see some relatives that i did not see for the last year. I guess that new trends and experiences can really change and influence one’s perception.